Why honesty matters in communication (& the risks of exaggeration)

Most of us exaggerate from time to time.

The tendency is particularly prevalent among the young and is an inevitable part of growing up. We tend to exaggerate, for example, when we experiment with language, or when we attempt to impress our peers, or when we have a teenage outburst (‘my sister hates me!’ ‘I’ll never love anyone ever again!’ ‘If I don’t get a smartphone I’ll die!’ etc.)

As we mature, we exaggerate less, but it is surprising how many adults still do so regularly. Sometimes its purpose is to make us feel important or influential – or provide some excitement into a drab day – but whatever our motives might be, any gains tend to be short term. The person who is apt to exaggerate habitually risks many undesirable consequences, not least of which is the loss of the respect and the trust of others. 

But some wouldn’t knock the technique: one of the most talked-about men on the planet, Donald Trump, proudly promotes such a tactic in his book ‘The Art of the Deal’ (1987):

“I call it truthful hyperbole…it’s a very effective form of promotion.” 

This business philosophy carried over into his presidency and remains a dominant part of his communication arsenal. So why should he change? Who can say that his ‘truthful hyperbole’ hasn’t worked for him? 

It most certainly has, but at some cost. He is not the only politician to have a loose relationship with the truth, but the depth and extent of his deceit is beyond doubt. His innumerable exaggerations, blatant falsehoods and hostility to any challenge have helped to make him the deeply divisive figure that he is today. 

How refreshing it would be for him to change tactic and reduce his regular embroidery! We told him this* when we met him** some years ago. We often speak on the phone*** so we hope to have the opportunity to advise him again.

Then again, perhaps Voltaire had it right some 300 years ago when he described exaggeration to be the ‘inseparable companion of greatness’.

Key to our ‘truthful hyperbole’:
* can’t recall our exact words
** saw him coming out of Trump Tower
*** we do, just not to each other

 

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